Creating a Mental Health Toolkit for Your Tween
As your child enters their tween years, life can begin to feel like a rollercoaster for both them and the adults who love them. With increasing social pressures, growing academic expectations, and rapid physical and emotional changes, tweens truly go through a lot. They often need extra support navigating both their inner and outer world, and it can be hard for parents to know how to help as their child continues to change.
One practical and empowering way to support your tween is by helping them create a Mental Health Toolkit. This is a personalized set of strategies, tools, and resources they can lean on when big feelings show up. A toolkit does not replace professional support, but it can build resilience, improve emotional awareness and regulation, and give your tween a sense of control over their well-being.
Hear From Them
Start by asking your tween what kinds of things help when they feel stressed or have a hard day. Invite them to take the lead, and if they are unsure, you can offer a few gentle suggestions to help them get started. Helping them identify what works for their nervous system fosters ownership and self-awareness.
Encourage a Physical Toolkit
Having something tangible like a box, pouch, or small bag can make it more likely that your tween will actually use the tools inside. They can keep a toolkit at home or place a smaller version in their backpack for school. You can even encourage them to decorate it so it feels personal and meaningful.
Fill It With Helpful Tools
There are countless options for what your tween can include in their toolkit. Below are categories and ideas to help guide the process.
Calming Items
Stress balls or fidget toys
Something soft, like a blanket or stuffed animal
Scented lotion or essential oils
Noise cancelling headphones and access to calming music
Emotional Regulation Aids
A small notebook for writing or doodling
A feelings wheel to help label and communicate emotions
Grounding exercise reminders, such as 5-4-3-2-1
A link to grounding tools (optional to add if you want to connect to your other blog post)
Distractions
A small puzzle or mini Lego set
Coloring pages, markers, or other creative activities
Music that feels comforting or distracting in a helpful way
A favorite book
Safety Plan
A safety plan can be a simple, accessible list of people and resources your tween can reach out to when they need help beyond the other tools in their kit. Have a calm conversation about who they feel comfortable talking to, when they should reach out to an adult, and what helps them feel safe while doing so. Include names of trusted adults at home, school, and any other supportive spaces.
Why It Matters
Creating a Mental Health Toolkit is a simple yet powerful way to equip tweens with healthy coping skills before the teen years amplify everything. It supports emotional intelligence, independence, and a sense of safety. Most importantly, it gives your child tools they can turn to when life feels overwhelming.
If your tween is struggling or you would like guidance on building coping strategies tailored to their needs, Reach Counseling is here to help. We specialize in supporting children, tweens, and families through life’s transitions and challenges, and we would be honored to walk alongside your family.